Standards - The new Black

What’s old is new and full knowledge of your past definitely dictates your future. All those cliche's have proven themselves to be true as I've grown older and assumed more ‘grown-up’ responsibilities. I realize the life I want to live for myself is built on the same foundation on which I was raised and habits that were drilled into me as a child by my mother have become mantra’s by which I live my life. Rules that I once rebelled against I have embraced wholeheartedly as an adult and it took 34 yrs for me to realize the value of her words and the person she was shaping me to become. I thank god for her, even it took me many years to appreciate her.

Things such as moral fortitude, being able to be taken at your word and to stand by your beliefs, being non-judgmental and objective, being a good world citizen are things that I find most important to me now. Yes there is value in recreational things, but the microwave generation only focuses on the pleasure and not the hard work necessary to have that level of enjoyment. Know that you deserve in any relationship (family, friend, personal) to be a valued as the value you place on the people you interact with. I have become disillusioned with this pop culture society that places emphasis on material gains over personal relationships and teaches our young to measure their worth based on how much goods they can accumulate over a life time, how much skin they can show and how much 'partying' they can do in their youth. While I will not deny that the ability to provide a strong stable financial environment for yourself and / or your family is also a measure of a person, as well as the ability to enjoy this experience called life. It is not the final criteria by which character should be judged. I do believe that this physical wealth is a by-product of character wealth.

Never forget to see the good in people because that it currency that never expires and can be used in the leanest and meanest of times and whose yield is infinite to the value of what was invested. As I look forward to once again being a mother, I look at the life I have raised in my 15 yr old baby and the lessons I have imparted to him and learned from him, as well as the mistakes I have made with him because I too was still learning as we grew and that wisdom needed to impart strong values may have blossomed later than sooner. I realize that without him and these experiences I would not now be in a position to face the new challenges that await me. My new mantra is ‘Pedigree is learned not earned’ and morals, etiquette and manners and not reserved only for the wealthy. My life and all its mistakes are a vast wealth of knowledge with which to impart to my son as to how to navigate the pitfalls of life. Life is a fun ride when you comfortable in the skin you are in and know that for good or for bad, you are loved. At the end of the day your biggest contribution to this world is being true to yourself and that will in turn allow you to be true to family and friends.

My only regret so far has been that I have allowed fear to dictate the chances I’ve taken and roads I’ve travelled. Although it is still not too late to shake off those shackles, I am still burdened not only by a fear of failure but to some degree the opinions of others.

I will tell my boys to LIVE and live their BEST life, make good decisions that you will be proud of and that will allow you to hold your head high in the midst of adversity. Be a leader and not a follower but know that sometimes in order to lead you must be willing to follow. Challenge yourself at every turn and no matter how menial the task, perform it as if it was the one thing by which you will be judged. Know that sometimes the road to what you want to do is paved with what you need to do. Never settle for mediocrity or you will end up being like everybody else. Being different is good; it means you are succeeding in making your mark in this world. Parents and grown ups are not perfect and we have made our share of mistakes, learn from them and be better that we could ever hope to be.

Standards are the new black, set them high and you will be a trendsetter for life.